August first -waking up from a dream

"The secret of seeing is to sail on solar wind.Hone and spread your spirit ,till you yourself are a sail ,whetted , translucent, broadside  to the merest puff."

                                                                              Annie Dillard-

Waking up

next to a small plastic figure

of a soccer player, could be

from" Manchester United" 

who knows?

they all look alike under their shirts

without their slogans

they are mere plastic arms and muscular

plastic leggs.

He holds his plastic arms wide for a hug

but i only hold him near to my heart

sending a  message of "I  miss you"

to the child that had forgotten

his soccer playing doll at home

in bed with me.

The doll does not say "good morning"

or ask for a muffin or a cup of coffee

but he is silent as the rain falls outside

 placing words of rain drops in his plastic

mouth, which will say what i want him to say

he depends on my decision today.

I can keep him or throw him away

to the ground where the small brown dog

will surely get him and chew on his muscular

plastic leggs or his handsome chiseled face.

I decide to leave him in the mess of blankets

as long as the small dog can not be found.

and open up the window so he can take

 some fresh air in his plastic lungs.

I control his fate, as he lays on the blankets naked

at last a man i can play with and not be played with,

a man who not be hanging up the phone when i want to talk,

a man who will listen to me when i have something to say

but they say David Beckham has a need to be neat

but as he is lying here helpless in my piles of  beddings

he realizes he is under my control and i can not be beat.

Is this the only relationship inwhich i  may have some power ?

did i dream of spleandor in the green grass or of horror?

The rain is speaking of roses and trees ,

be real, the rain says,

 be real.