Annual Carolyn Madden Roast - Happy Birthday Week Girlie!

I must say, Carolyn - you are quite succulent. We should roast you more often. Why are you screaming? What do you mean that is not what they mean by roast?

happy birthday, carolyn! will your cake be upside down, too??

Happy Birthday Carolyn, Pass the cranberry sauce. Moya

They've got it all wrong, Carolyn!

You're frying on the bbq, along with the snaggers as you slurp your chilled stubby - with ugg boots still on.

Happy birthday!

Magi

Carolyn, cancel the dancing boys, Hugh is on his way, special request!

Carolyn who?

Happy Birthday week Carolyn. How about reposting your history of Orstralia for us?

Cindy - is that what that bright light is? I wondered why it was upside down!

Happy birthday Carolyn! And many more!

Hi Carolyn - thanks Faith for inviting me here. truth is, I have been lusting after Carolyn for years now. I've wanted to meet her and now, after reading that she wants to meet me too (that is a good picture of me, Doll), I knew I could finally let my secret out. For your birthday, darling Carolyn, I will sing to you:

I've Got a Crush On You Lyrics
Artist(Band):Frank Sinatra

How glad the many millions of Annabelles and Lillians
Would be to capture me
But you had such persistence, you wore down my resistance
I fell and it was swell

I'm your big and brave and handsome Romeo
How I won you I shall never never know
It's not that you're attractive
But, oh, my heart grew active
When you came into view

I've got a crush on you, sweetie pie
All the day and night-time give me sigh
I never had the least notion that
I could fall with so much emotion

Could you coo, could you care
For a cunning cottage we could share
The world will pardon my mush
'Cause I have got a crush on you

Could you coo, could you care
For a cunning cottage
That we could share
The world will pardon my mush
'Cause I have got a crush, my baby, on you

The good news Carolyn - you are on the Atkins diet - so we won't gain weight from roasting you!

Happy birthweek, Carolyn!

I'm surprised no one has figured out why she celebrates for a whole week: haven't you all heard that it's always tomorrow in Australia? So it can never actually be today, and therefore, it's never actually your birthday! You have to go with the week there instead of the day. See what I mean?

(What do you mean about how many glasses of wine have I had to celebrate? What does that matter?! Do you know what a non-sequitur is?!?! Go look it up!!!!!)

does your birthday start on Greenwich Mean Time or Pacific time or what?

caro - hugh came, and sang to you. what else could you EVER want?? whoo!!!

I lived with Caroyn so it might be a bit unfair for me to Roast her as I have seen her in her underwear....(Her lust for Hugh is just a cover, she is too shy to come out of the closet yet)
Birthday week not only applies to her, the tradition rubs off onto any member of her extended family...I have been celebrating since Sunday arvo.. unfortunately cups of milo and glasses of milk are all i can celebrate with this year (boohoo) Still, I'm blaming the drink for the fact your parcel is sitting on my bench instead of being in the post..

Ah dear me. Monica's been over-medicating herself again... rofl

This is very sweet and funny of you Monica thankyou very much. I'll respond now before the cocktail hour starts so as not to get too mushy and dribbly. (and later I'll probably respond again when i am too mushy and dribbly, what else are birthday weeks for afterall.)

Thanks to you all for your lovely birthday week wishes. I don't know what has excited me most, Hugh Jackman turning up or Stephen putting his own pretty mug back up and losing the dumb dog pictures... Ok, maybe Hugh wins by a microphone. And there's nothing quite so dreamy as a Frank Sinatra tune sung just right. yummmm. What's that Hugh? Shall we dance? Ooh you betcha. See you guys later, I have some swooning to do!

Wait, Carolyn, what's this I hear about you and my twin brother Lou? I must tell you, I am much better than he is. And actually, it is he that is married, not I! We only use his wife as mine for publicity stunts. So I am free to be yours, my lady! Let me take you into my arms and turn on some Etta James "At Last." After all, at last, we are together. Orby, can you watch the kiddies for a few days?

pmsl I cannot believe how my luck has changed! That naughty penguin mug that Pam sent me must have magical powers. If this all works out with Hugh I'll send the mug on to the next BAV who most deserves some action.

(Orby.. sshshhshshhsh.. ffs, here i am within a whisker of getting some Hughboyloving and you go making all sorts of INSANE suggestions that i bat for the other team. Ignore her Hugh, postnatal hysteria has set in..)

It's okay Doll, you have proved to me that you are ONLY batting for MY TEAM. You like penguins? I love penguins!

And they called it penguin luurrvvv..and it starts with just a hug,
Tell them all, oh tell it's lots of fun, to try each position on that mug..

hehehe

I feel the need to dramatically express my feelings for you, Carolyn. Here it is - ODE TO CAROLYN:

Your lips make me quiver.

Your eyes simply shimer.

I can't get enough of you!

We'll wake in the morning dew!

Carolyn my dear,

always promise to be near!

Your birthday week we'll celebrate

I promise I'll leave you nothing to hate.

So little time together,

you'll wish it could go on forever.

I'll kiss that drool right off your face,

then carry you to that special place.

Tell me I am yours!

I want to sink into all your pores.

And maybe - I'll even do some chores!

Hugh, you've made me feel right girlie
ever since I first saw you as Curly
You know I've always wanted to phone ya
from that day I saw you in Oklahoma

And here you are with me now
I can't help thinking, wow
Dreams really can come true
especially if you've had a drink or too.

Don't worry about the chores my dear
I'm happy just because you're here
And we'll be doing too much pashing
to worry about who's doing the washing
(that's a sight rhyme folks. birthdays make me erudite)

Our time together will be short because
You have to get back to The Boy From Oz
I understand and won't be complaining
As long as we've done some serious sheet-staining.

Consider my 'pores' yours to sink in
(I know what you were really thinking)
As for kissing the drool upon my face
there's ooze for you in another place.

Now I dont want Monica to get all harried
we cant behave like this until we're married.
So, call the preacher, announce the bans
and we'll break the hearts of your other fans.

Hugh, though it's you I love the most
I can't forget my other friends at this roast
So take a break til next I tickle ya
I just want to say again, THANKYOU MONICA!

(well, you find a better rhyme for Monica, if you're so bloody clever!)

I'll take a piece of that roast. Pink in the middle please

Gotta admire a man who isn't afraid to declare he's not a vegetarian. Hugh? You're relieved.

Monica you are going to make Carolyn take a cold shower! OH I mean HUGH!... snicker

Carolyn I just can't think of anything off the top of my head to pick on you about. :) (notice I am the kind sister) lol

I am glad you love the mug and hope it brings you some birthday bliss!

OH.. Don Ms. Carolyn will eat you alive for that roast!

Happy birthday Carolyn!

Ahh Carolyn, love, sleep tight my sweet darling. I've longed for you through all these years. I can wait a few more hours til it is your birthday.

Hey what about me. I was your first love. You told me you'd wait. Whats up with that?

I just saw Stephen's photo of Curly for you and thought MAN that's blurry but then again if you've been drinking then I bet Curly looks just fine!

snicker

Carolyn, happy day and I hope Hugh is all you want him to be!

Hey! Where's the Conga line ?

LOL this has been quite a blast. Thankyou to everyone for chiming in. Especially Bruce, Mickey and Hugh who I suspect may be very surprised to learn they've been here.

It's my actual real birthday now (in oz) and I'm here to report on the loot. First of all, just look at this bootiful pretty dolly. I'm feeling a little like I'm four and not forty-four, but she is a doll for grownups (or sort of grownups) because she's a Red Hatter doll. Her purple frock is exquisite and she even has fishnet stockings but you can't see them because she's a lady. I also got series three of Northern Exposure on dvd PLUS the movie Kate and Leopold which you may recall stars a certain spunky Orstralian song and dance man. So, I did actually get Hugh Jackman for my birthday afterall! (these were all from lovely affluent younger sister who cant be with me this year because she's gone out west to have a holiday, but she left them here for me and I have shown INCREDIBLE restraint in not opening them til this morning) And I was given a lovely drawing of an Allosaurus skeleton from my very talented son and I got lots of slobbery cuddles from my other very talented son.

So, you see I've been totally spoiled by you all there and by these fine folks here at home. My real live human friend is coming over this afternoon and she reckons she's bringing wine in an actual bottle so that will be another lovely treat for me. mind you after last night, the thought of wine is a bit icky right now.. but I'm sure i'll have recovered by then!

Thanks so much everyone, and particularly that woman of a thousand faces, my darling Monica.

I was far from the Madden crowd, but now I'm in the loop. Happy 34th, kiddo.

I can only claim a small portion of this - but I have me suspects on who most of your celebrity visits were from!

Well, here I am...a Janey Come Lately...I think I lost my way a bit. All that swimming to Ostrayllllller and come to find out everybody's Gathered on the net, which is in fact the fifth dimension, except it doesn't sing quite as well.

But seriously folks, if Carolyn's birthday is such a huge event that we have to spread it out over an entire week, who am I to argue? Speaking of spreading, how's that diet working for ya, CM? I should talk...I've got more chins than Chinatown and I never have to iron...just sit on the clothing for a few minutes and it's pressed perfectly...lucky me to have such a broad...um...biblical beast of burden.

This would have been funny, but I was fresh out of Scotch.

At any rate, Dear Carolyn, thanks for being such a good sport about all this degredation and pots calling the kettle black in celebration of your nativity. I think your Mum did quite well bringing you into this world, despite the hysterical shepherds.

TTFN!

Oh, and Happy Birthday, lady!! CYBER HUGS!

Belated birthday wishes for someone special. Hope your special 'birth' week brought lots of joy & happiness to you Carolyn.

Now this was a really "look at meee, look at meeee, look at meeeee" birthday bash and I missed it. Did you invite Kath and Kim? Here's to across the ditch from a kiwi gal. Hope you had a wonderful wonderful day. Just sorry I didn't see this roasting sooner. At least I can ask if you saw the Warriors score at the week-end. Cheers. Here catch! another stubbie coming your way.

Carolyn daaaaaahlink -

I'm late, but hell - that just means that this can be extended for ANOTHER week!!! I seem to have missed the celebrity throng.....but what's this???? Someone has closed THE BAR?????

I'm sorry, this simply won't do! Barkeep!!!!! Barkeep!!!!! A Mimosa please (it is after all only 6:42 am here in sunny Arizona...)

Ahhhh...that's much better. Think I'll stay away from that cake though...is that berry filling fermenting?

Carolyn my dear - you are the tops. Mum extraorinaire, queen of the down-under one liners, and an extremely talented writer. (hic)

What? I'm supposed to say tongue in cheek mean things to her? (hic) Oh, I dunno if I can manage that one.....my that MIMOSA was tasty....probably should have had a little breakfast first though......(hic, hic)

Back to Carolyn.....how could I say anything mean (hic) about a woman who shares my passion for purple and is suffering through the same (hic) diet I'm currently subjecting myself to?

Sob.....She's just the BEST....sniffle......(hic, hic, hic)...one of Gather's finest......

Oh dear, Fred has just come into the kitchen with his paper and I'm afraid I'm totally busted (HIC!!!)

Have a marvelous 24th dear - you deserve it!

LOL - Gisela- are Mimosas on that diet? ROFL Busted again!

Hey - why not just keep the birthday going through the end of June! OR as long as anyone wants to say stuff to Carolyn! LOL I think Carolyn is off having fun with Hugh still though - she is being offly quiet!