by Magi the magical poet is riding the wind again
Member since:
March 29, 2006

Inscribed

May 22, 2006 04:36 AM EDT
views: 87 | rating: 9.9/10 (15 votes) | comments: 33

 

When I gaze

at you

I see yesterday

on your face

 

and I read

the ledger

of bought and

sold and exchanged

with profit

and loss all

weighed and balanced

 

clearly engraved in

the doom

of the soul

in your eyes

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Comments: 33

Kathryn E. May 22, 2006, 4:44am EDT
Magi, that last stanza is very powerful. It nails the whole poem !!!
Kathryn, thank you very much!

Magi
Kevin (''The SiteWizard'') V. May 22, 2006, 5:08am EDT
Magi, Please stop...you're forcing me to develop an appreciation for poetry that I never had before.... ;-)
manoj sanyal May 22, 2006, 5:40am EDT
Loved reading.... excellent.
Kevin, I thought your were a lost cause. Thank you for the comment. But if I can do it, so can you. And I'm not talking programming.

Magi
Well, John, thank you sincerely for your generous comment. Given the debate that's been raging, I'm hesitating to post anything - being flamed can't be enjoyable. But then, I'll just keep following my guiding star anyway.

Magi
And Manoj, thank you, too. Last but not least.

Magi
Faith H. May 22, 2006, 6:10am EDT
Magi, looks like I'm becoming a fan also, this is a wonderful piece to wake up to.
Faith, thank you for the compliment. Hopefully, my writing won't disappoint you.

Magi

P.S. Here in Western Australia it is autumn, and the evening has fallen.
Helen W. May 22, 2006, 4:33pm EDT
Magi, good job! Love it.
Laurie White May 22, 2006, 5:56pm EDT
Very nice, Magi. He sounds like quite a dark figure. (although I guess it could be a she?)
Thank you, CIndy. It took a bit of thought and doing.

Magi
Heather and Helen, it's all in the eyes or so I've experienced. Thank you for your comments.

And thank you, too, Laurie. I think you can read a person's eyes regardless of gender.

Magi

I'm thanking you all in this one comment box because Gather is freezing up after each post. The only way of overcoming it seems to be by hitting the refresh button.
Edward Nudelman May 22, 2006, 6:41pm EDT
Magi, this is one of the most hauntingly beautiful poems I have read in a long time here. It is stark in its simplicity, forceful in its declaration of loss, and tragic in the annunciation of finality. In addition, the title is perfect, a word not mentioned in the poem, a difficult thing to pull off, but it works perfectly.
Good morning (my time), Edward.

Thank you sincerely for your most generous comment - coming from you, it is a compliment indeed.

Magi
Carolyn Madden May 22, 2006, 8:10pm EDT
I love your poem Nicola. It feels strong and very moving. Coming from me though that doesnt mean much because i'm a thickhead when it comes to proper poetry. What I DID want to say though is right now, this moment, we are one and two on the gather community picks..

AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE OY! OY! OY!

.. This tiny moment of parochial glee is over and you may resume normal gathering... :o)
Granny Janny H. May 22, 2006, 9:15pm EDT
So few words
Say so much
You have the Poet's Touch!
Carolyn - good grief, I hadn't noticed. It'd be the first time for me. Congrats to you - oh, and to me. I wonder if this is some sort of first? Go Aussie, OY! OY! OY!

Ah, parochial glee is so very brief!

Thank you for your comments.

Magi
Jan, thank you for your generous comment.

Magi
Amazing...
Hannah, thank you!

Magi
Emily L. May 23, 2006, 10:43am EDT
Beautiful writing. I like the visual balance of the lines in the second stanza, but somehow the way that 'bought and sold and exchanged with profit and loss..." are split up made it necessary for me to reread with more careful attention in order to understand what you were trying to say. I think particularly I had wanted to add another 'and' between 'loss' and 'all'.

It makes me sad that I can pick out people in my world who this describes...
Emily, thank you for your thoughtful comment. The poem deals with what too often stares us in the face.

Magi
Bonnie L. May 28, 2006, 4:10am EDT
Sometimes it's not quite as easy as black and white, bought and sold, now is it? But I like the way the poem flows and visually balances too....Sorry I missed this last week but great job Magi!
Bonnie, it's what is bought at what cost that you can read on a person's face - and note the softness or hardness of the eyes.

And thank you for coming to this and commenting.

Magi
perry long Jul 12, 2006, 1:55pm EDT
Nicely, nicely done. I think of the real danger that exists just now in the good old USA. Fighting to save the soul.
Perry, thank you. The USA and the world is at a crossroads.

Magi
The eyes reveal so many things, Magi.
Indeed they do, Renda!
Esther IS Flesh and Blood S. Nov 13, 2008, 3:24am EST
Excellent thoughts and words in all of their simplicity.

(It's a sad shame that I see this everyday. Eyes ~ the peephole into the soul.)
Shelbia C. Jan 15, 2009, 6:52pm EST
This is a lovely
You are most kind, Esther. Eyes are indeed the windows of the soul, my friend.
Thank you very much, Shelbia.

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