Small Pieces Lost In A Big World

Photography has become my reason to explore the world. This summer I will make the exploration of a lifetime and hopefully gain a little insight into the world along my way.

Waiting for Federal Express to deliver my airline tickets to Nepal was the beginning of this journey becoming real for me. After signing for the envelope, I ripped it open. I was a little more than disappointed to find that they were receipts of my electronic tickets, not actual boarding passes. So, I grabbed the phone book and called Continental Airlines to reserve my seats.

While listening to the repetitive elevator hold music, I thought to myself, "this is good, I can reserve a window seat, I want to see Mt. Everest from the sky".

After waiting what seemed an eternity, an agent was on the line. As I requested the window seat, I explained to him that I had read about flying over Mt. Everest, and how it was supposed to be the most amazing view.

"Katmandu is one of the few places I have never been", the agent replied. "But I have flown over Mt. Everest before and I can tell you, it really makes you think about where you fit into this world."

As I hung up the phone, exhilarated and excited, his claim about Everest repeated itself in my head. "It is a sign", I thought. Out of all my plans for this trip, I knew that I would accomplish at least one goal, a little understanding of this big world.

Looking back, there was a time that I thought I knew it all. I was eighteen, a high school graduate, and on my way to college. After two years of a pre-veterinary program, I wasn't so sure.

After dropping out I moved away to a small little town, Athens, GA. I got my first bartending job thinking, "This is the life". I was making cash every night and spending it faster. Looking back, I really see now just how fast that lifestyle was. I worked until 3 a.m. and then partied till the sun came up, just to sleep the day away and do it all again.

It was then that I began to photograph my life. Photography began as a way for me to hold on to a life that I knew couldn't last. Through those pictures I began to see my life from the outside and from a new perspective.

I spent two years in Atlanta attending classes for an associate's degree in photography. After going on a school trip to Italy for a couple of months, I realized that I wanted to see the world. Through my camera, I had begun to see for the light within the world and not the shadows that I had been living in.

I may not know what the world will hold in store for me after I graduate next year, but I know that this summer I will learn a little more about the world. As I travel through South East Asia I will learn about culture and life that I have only before seen in magazines and films. I know that I will gain an understanding of a world, that is smaller than I once thought, and myself, who is stronger than I could have ever imagined.

In photojournalism I have found new hope, a way to explore the world and display it's life for others to see. I look forward to having a collection of images of places and people that few people that I know have ever seen. So, off to Shangri-la I go, to see Mt. Everest and to see where I fit into this mixed-up world and to find the little pieces of my hidden self along the way.