Like a dandelion to the wind he goes

Wow Kathryn, This is really a strong poem. I get the sense your sons wants to leave and your against his choices. This is really sad. I feel for you. I hope things work out 18, seems to young to leave home. Take care and Excellent poem.

nice. the likening of a child growing up to the dandilion on the wind - excellent choice.

I just read Ruby's comment, and I did not see this as sad. There is sadness at the loss of the child, and fear for his future, but not sadness overall. There is joy in the new "man". hmmm.... different perceptions.

Ruby, no that isn't it. A line of poetry from my old, dear poet Yeats has stayed with me my whole life. It goes something like this: "An unfinished man [and his dreams], ....the finished man among his enemies." I just hope that he can find his hopes and dreams amid the rough patches that life throws one's way. We are sad, I, especially, that he will be leaving, but it is not far. He is very special to me, being our first-born and our only son.

Nancy, the image of the dandelion to the wind was with me all last week as I sorted through my feelings and images, thinking of writing this.

Nancy, yes, joy in the new man, but worries that, as we grow older, we come to realize that not all our dreams may be realized; this produces disappointment. I hope that he lives with promises fulfilled, not disappointment.

it's beautiful - the love and hope drown out the worry.

Kathryn....You have been displaying your poetic side beautifully lately! I love how you so wonderfully capture every mother's feelings in this as she watches her baby enter adulthood. It's a bittersweet moment, and it brings with it a whole new set of worries and fears....the things we hope we have armed them well with, but cannot shield them from.

hopes wilt and wither and fade
this I cannot protect him

And I sense your willigness to hold lightly and freely, knowing that the dandelion seeds float so lightly into the wind have the power of seeding the world. May your boy be blessed.

Very nice, Kathryn. I feel your pain, as it were. I love the repetition of the theme line.

You have a mother's concerns - always - and especially for the son no longer a child but not yet a man. Even older, he will know that special place where a mother's love comes from - he'll rebell, repent and reconnect with all that is important to him - your love.
I really liked that Kathryn, and I rarely read poetry. Beautiful!

Mona, I do hope the love and hope drown the worry.

True, Bonnie, we arm them well, but can only hope it all works out.

Beryl, yes, the power of seeding the world....

Kal, I'm just beginning to feel that children grow into our friends; his grilfriend was with us at dinner last night; it was very special.

Yes, Ed, I know you do share these feelings, as the parent of three grown children...

Well, Richard, I guess I'm doing something right if you read it - and that you rarely read poetry...

beautiful poem, kathryn. so full o flove.

Love your poem Kathryn. It's hard to break the apron strings when our children grow up and leave the nest. We can only pray that a good foundation was laid that will carry them through.

Kathryn, this hits way too close to home for me. My oldest son is turning 18 a week from today and graduating from high school *sniff* Beautiful poem.

Thanks, Jessie. So sad, too. And September is still months away !!!

Martha, thank you. Speaking of apron strings, I have a housecoat challenge that is ongoing. It is to write about any housecoat, duster, housedress or apron - either memories or what it means to you. Interested? Email me.

Laurie, you and I must TALK, girlfriend. I'm hitting the email button NOW.

Kathryn,
" hopes wilt and wither and fade"
I'm willing to bet that if every generation that ever was had the ability to protect their kids from one thing in life, preventing their hopes from wilting and fading would be the number one choice across the board. Maybe someday.

George, maybe someday !!!

Joseph, I'll address the otjher comments later. You MISSED the best part of the entire poem: "time-shifts slip in my mind" "not the clickety-clack of a movie reel"...You must be from crtic's corner. I'll never publish there again. This was an exercise in creativity. I've seen some of the comments in that group, academic and without creative soul.

Thank you, Dianna.

Joseph, this is free form. My line breaks are my own. I could care less about what Bukowski does. No one on Gather is worthy of a Yeats. Is anybody but Yeats worthy of a Yeats? Thought not. I'm a journalist and creative non-fiction writer by trade. I'll certainly never publish to the critic's corner again. Your comments are beside the point, which is also my impression of a lot of what that goes on in that group. I've recently rediscovered my poetic voice. Your comment was one of the reasons I opeed NOT to go for a Ph.D. in English, DRY BALLS.

Kathryn- you go girl!
I have a son that is soon to be 20, but did not worry about him too bad when he left high school. BUT, my daughter just had her high school graduation pictures taken and in less than a month she'll be out. She has been everything a father could ask for in the past 17 years and 11 months. I'm starting to feel like your poem, and having a bit of anxiety about the future, the nest, men, college, etc.
It's gone so fast...

John S., YOU know then, what every parent goes through !!!

We look to poets to voice what we feel. Thank you Kathryn. Moya

Kathryn, very nice. The undercurrent of the angst of parenthood is a roller coaster ride with not hand holds.
Re the comments...I consider the poem to be 'little' piece of the poets soul.

Thank you, Moya. I'm so behind in my reading of others; I have to get to you tonight.

Thank you, John. Yes, poetry is about soul, as well as other things. Now, I have to finish a private letter to my son that he doesn't even know I'm writing.

Joseph, I was just at your homepage, reading your about and your article. I was the first to comment on it. Gather is a community, first and foremost, a literary salon or workshop, second. I thought you were from The Critic's Corner. You are not. Perhaps you might like to join. It is for serious criticism of writing, as it states in the group description.

Gather has 20,000 members from around the world from all walks of life, economic strata, cultural and ethinic backgrounds, and all different professions, not just the literary or media related. You finid professionals and people with no more than a high school education writing fine articles. It is about commuinty. Gather is a place of spirit, of giving as well as receiving.

Though you may technically be correct about the poem, consider this fact: Most works on Gather have a short shelf life, usually about a day. There is a lot of pressure on the part of Gatherites to slog on.

Generally, the open forum at Gather (this space) is not really intended for 'honest' or 'constructive' criticism. A lot of what passes as 'constructive criticism' is destructive, with the underlying intent to say why something is bad, rather than to show how it can be made better.
Gather is not an academic institution, it is a community. With people of varying abilities. If so-called bad writing, especially 'bad' poetry offends you, as you state in your 'interesting things about you', consider this:
Everybody has a story to tell. That is MORE important on Gather than how well it conforms to the GREATS of the world. Cast not the first stone, my friend...

Kathryn, I enjoyed your poem, as I usually enjoy all your writing. I can certainly relate to your subject matter. I think it takes a teremendous amount of bravery, tenacity and perseverence to be the parent ofa child who has found his/her wings. I applaud you for smacking the self appointed critic or more appropriately, criticizer, Joe Poe, right where he deserves it. He seems to pop up everywhere these days, leaving a trail of destruction in his wake. The only place he hasn't made himself evident is in posting his own work. He freely admits that he doesn't write poetry, or perhaps he simply doesn't have the courage to post it, yet he is quite bold and voracious when it comes to devaluing the work of others with a vile and purulent vengeance. He has no history here. He posts no writing of his own. He has earned no credentials among Gather members, nor, it appears, anyone's respect. You are absolutely right Kathryn, his opinion doesn't count.for squat. I look forward to your next submission. And, as always, I appreciate constructive criticism, but ripping and tearing is not welcome here.

Antoinette, Joe Poe has 1 article. His own "things about me." You can search it, using the 'search articles.' I was the first to comment on it.

There is another article that I found on the left-hand side "recent" articles, but I clicked away from it before I could get its title. Not Joe's don't remeber who wrote it, but part of the title was "Sadism 101"...about constructive criticism...

My next artcile will be 20 more of the "things about me." Then, I have to get cracking on the Sixties series....

Your words are a great comfort to me, Antoinette. I don't get around to everybody as much as I should, I'm sorry. I hope to do that in the next couple of days. I work full-time.

Cathy, you are so sweet, reading my work. I really enjoyed your teen talk aritlce !!! You have a very good heart, I know where that comes from, in part it comes from your faith. I thank you for that.

Joseph, I'll rewrite this if you do a complete rewrite of your one Gather article and make IT better.

Joseph, I will say this. My rewrite will take awhile. I'm expecting a TOTAL rewrite - re-vision of yours, because it wasn't very good. I'd like to see something that shows the real you - your experiences, your life, background, how you feel about things. Make it uniquely JP.

But I will also say that going around Gather the way you do will not get you 'points' or points or friends. Better to work within the system than to buck it. Now, i have to go to my family and my full-time job tomorrow. I've been published for 30 years, though not in poetry.

Joseph, OK. If you want to keep it real, then how about this. In your rewrite, Make me laugh. Make me cry. Put yourself out there, neck first and dare to be great.

Kathryn, I read Joseph's article yesterday, after I read his thorough trashing of Laura M's May Day poem. It was important to me to at least have some idea of who he is before I told Laura what I thought of his assessment. What I found there was one single article from a man who has been a member of this site for only a few days, but speaks with the feigned authority of a person who would have us believe he is a great poet. His article was loaded with negativity, as well as insulting, demeaning, derogatory remarks toward women, toward the majority of writers, all Gather members, cat owners, watercolorists, dog lovers, parents, "ugly people." and the intended readers of his article. In my humble opinion, his article is not particularly well written, nor grammatically correct. He is obviously a well educated man, but his article and his comments, so far, show a lack of respect for nearly everyone, including himself. His writing is pompous, arrogant, pretentious and imperious. His "critique" of the other writers is abrasive and offensive. I can't help but wonder who he thinks he is helping by attempting to denigrate their work ... or at the very least, to turn it into what HE thinks it should be. This isn't kindergarten, yes we are all adults here, and as such, we owe each other a certain measure of dignity, integrity, compassion and respect.



Joe Poe, John Doe, whoever you are or whatever you THINK you are, I am offended by your comments because of their destructive, not constructive nature. I am annoyed by anyone who finds it necessary to negate the value of others in order to bolster his opinion of himself. Until you condescend to treat the members of this site with a modicum of consideration, I shall continue to consider you, as I previously stated, "to be nothing more than an infected pustule, ripe with poison and venom, lying in wait for someone upon whom to spew his putrid contents." I guess that must be what you mean by "keeping it real." Meanwhile, I shall continue to peruse the news for some indication of who died and crowned you King of Poetry.

I really think Joseph is getting a bad rap, here. There are many hateful people on this site who go around randomly trashing others, but I do not believe he is one of them. I think what we're seeing here is a far more prevalent evil on Gather--the violent, negative overreaction of people to anything but the highest praise.

Well, Antoinette, I did read his article, as you saw, and saw my comment. I agree it is somewhat egregious of someone to put oneself above others if he or she cannot come up to snuff. There are a lot of good people, as you know, who spend a lot of hours working at making Gather work well. This includes the poets, fiction and non-fiction writers who work hard at their craft.

Sometimes newcomers think they can come in and be noticed without any work. I get a lot of emails from newcomers (since I am visible in the top contributors list, this is bound to happen) asking me to read their work, because they are not getting any comments. This is beside what you are saying.

I do agree with you about Joseph Poe, but will wait to see what he produces for his rewrite of his article. I guess I am very lucky, because after my first three days on Gather, back in January, I always had a lot of comments. My first two stories (after the first three days in which I ddin't get any comments, before I connected) had 30 or 40 comments.

I do see a lot of people with few or no comments. Sometimes they are not connected, or not somehow being known by other Gatherers. But what we write has a lot fo do with it, too.

I appreciate your perspective and your help, in this, Antoinette.

Hi, Johnny 5K. Haven't seen you around for awhile? How ya been? True, there are some people who go around rating 1s, but I agree, I don't think JP is one of them. But, except for special groups in which constructive criticism is expected, most people expect an apprecation of their work on Gather, rather than cricitism. If you read his article, I'd be in terested in your opinion. I have a BA in English, MA work in English and an MSJ in Journalism, with 3 daily newspapers and computer journalism expereince, as well as a book I copyedited. This does not speak to poetry, which I used to write in college, but to my skills and abilities as a writer. I only rediscovered my voice in poetry last week and do not pretend to be a real poet. What Antoinette is saying, and I agree, is that JP doesn['t have a leg to stand on. People who live in glass houses...I doubt JP can top my credentials or experience. As for your main point, some people do get upset when they see 1s. I haven't even noticed my ratings for quite some time. Today, i looked. Sure enough, it happened to me, too. I'm more concerned with having readers who are happy with what i write; that is what I aspire, and it seems, i achieve. I am very lucky to have a lot of devoted readers; Of this, I will say: I am very comfortable with the space in myself that speaks to the reader. I always enjoy your work, Johnny 5K and regret that it takes me so long to get around to all of my connections. I do have kids and a full-time job. I'm not one of the avid complainers.

Oh, Johnny 5K, he IS out of line.

Oh Kathyrn -

This is the song of any parent watching a child eagerly burst forth. We breathelessly watch life's winds shake and move them along that up currant and unknown cross breezes.

Enjoyed your poem. Hope you do more like this one.

Kathryn, this is totally awesome. I love how you compared the son to the dandelion...and oh how true.

Kathryn, you don't need any help. You are very good at what you do. I am a novice compared to you. I'm sure I'm oversensitive to the destructive comments of others even when they are not aimed at my own work. Maybe especially when they are aimed at people who write very well, in my estimation. I might not be so bothered if those arrows were aimed at me. I'm not sure why this guy got under my skin, or why I reacted so strongly to his insults, but, nonetheless, I stand by my convictions. I do wish he was brave enough to put his own work out there for others to judge as harshly as he has done. I won't comment on his work, though. I think I've said quite enough already. I think that I will crawl back under my umbrella in my lovely, sunny garden and be a nice, sweet, non-confrontational, Southern Belle like my Momma raised me to be. I'll write some more sweet romance and magical fantasy that oozes too much lush vocabulary, cosmic mysticism and voluptuous imagery ... and hope it doesn't make anyone sick.

Anita, HI !!! Yes, we watch as life moves them along. He will be in the same state, only a 3 hour drive, and probably will be back every month. A whole month without him - I feel so selfish!!!

Dawn, hi, thanks for stopping by. Thanks for reading my work !!!

Antoinette, thank you for your kind words. I 'd like to read your romances nad your fantasies. Before Gather, i had 100 pages of a romance novel I'm slotting for a mjaor romance paperback publisher. It's on the burner, back, now, for a while.

Kathryn, this poem speaks volumes about how I feel too with both me kids growing into adults and what I wish for them. Wonderfully done.

Serina, yes, I understand that perfectly about your klids and you. thank you.

Kathryn, I have to respectfully disagree with you here in your reponse to Mr. Poe. You note that Gather is first and foremost a community and a literary workshop second. I will counter with this: Gather was founded on the notion of providing a place where people can connect around shared passions. For some, that may simply be sharing their thoughts in various forms. Others are looking for input into their work, be it poetry, photography, fiction or something else. Still others just like to share their views on what is happening in the world with no real audience in mind. The point is, Gather is whatever we as members individually and as a group want to make of it. The thing to keep in mind is that Gather is "first and foremost" and open forum, and that whenever you post something to the community at large others have the ability and the right to comment however they wish. If you would rather not open yourself up to this sort of feedback, you can always post to a private group or only make your work available to all or part of your personal network.

As for Mr. Poe's feedback specifically, I found it to be very insightful and in most cases spot on. At the very least, you must appreciate the effort he took not only to carefully read your work but to take the time to think about it and construct very pertinent constructive criticism; and he did so, in my opinion, in a very respectful way. If you aren't interested in receiving criticism (and I use this term in the editorial sense) on your work, you can simply choose to ignore it but realize that just like in real life people here on Gather have opinions and will continue to share them.

I hope you can go back, re-read the comments made and reevaluate your response. Remember, Gather is a reflection of our world. As long as we can stay open-minded, we all stand to learn a great deal from each other.

Jeff, I looked up your profile. You've been on Gather since Aug. 31. That is a long time. Still, I've been published for 30 years - 30 YEARS !!! You and JP are in the minority with your opinion, believe me. I am extremely well connected here at Gather and know whereof I speak. I do not appreciate people defiling this space, dedicated to my poem about my son to various rants. You are a young businessman, what do you know about poetry? I was a poetry major in college at McGill, an excellent institution, like your alma mater.

There is a time and place for constructive cricitism. This is not the place. My comments stand. My opinions stand. JP is not getting a good reputation. People have been to this page and have emailed me.

I'm involved in many groups; there are places for constructive cricitcism. Are you familiar with The Critic's Corner or Writing Flash Fiction? Those are both constructive criticism groups, as is Constructive Criticism, by Monica Kennedy. This is not the place.

My work speaks for itself. Case closed.

You're right, Kathryn--your work does speak for itself. Everyone's does. But that doesn't mean that it automatically negates the validity of someone's opinion of said work if the author happens to disagree with it or perceives it as negative. That said, I reread JP's comments and I'm genuinely puzzled as to why you seem to have taken them so personally.

As for "the place" of constructive criticism, I believe that it should be welcomed--for better or for worse--everywhere on Gather, not just in specialized groups.

I have asked people not to defile this space dedicated to the poem about my son, which has now been used as a rant.Please respect that. Show me that you can write well, Joe.

Joe, I made that remark to Jeff, not you.

Joe, Joe, Joe, what to do about you. You keep bucking the established trend here at Gather. The established trend is to post CRITICISM INVITED, if wanted. Otherwise, butt out.

First of all, I do feel that the emotion conveyed in this poem comes through nicely.

As a perfectionist at heart, I think that whatever we do in life, we should never settle for a first draft. I think if you take a short step back for a moment, Kathryn, you can once again see Joe and Jeff's comments as constructive and not destructive. In addition, I think that Joe was making a valid point when suggesting that writers post "Criticism not welcome" in addition to "Criticism invited" where applicable. The general Gather population doesn't spend hours upon hours here. Those of us who are newer to Gather may not know "the established trends" on how to provide constructive criticism, so I think it's wise not to get upset with those who don't. And I think there are a lot of Gatherers who think a lot about what we're posting before we post, and don't just post the first idea that comes into our heads. That should be valued as well.

Lastly, just because you may be one of the most active people on Gather doesn't mean you can disqualify the comments and professions of others who are newer than you.

Laura, first, I am not a poet. I am a journalist and sometimes fiction writer. This is essentially a poeticallly incorrect poem, if you will. Joseph Poe has developed a bad reputation recently of going and trashing other people's poems; he haas been here just 4 days and has 1 prose article. to speak of. The people he trashes are very visible in terms of their number of articles and their quality. I have a challenge to Joe to write a poem that will rock Gather. Put his money where his mouth is. I simply do not have time to rewrite, nor the inclination. This was about MY son. This is not a school. It has been the custom of many at Gather to post CRITICISM INVITED, when they want it; otherwise, it is expected that people will not criticize. There are at least 3 groups where people commonly criticize. I've been here for months now, one of the original beta members, and I've never seen anything like the behavor that Joseph Poe exhibits.

His comments are NOT designed to be constructive; they are malicious in nature. Constructive criticism offers suggestions on how to make it better, specific suggestions. I've been an editor for a long time; I've been published for 30 years. Who is Joe Poe is what everyone is wondering? He has no standing here.

Exactly, Laura A!!

I am not overly familiar with Gather.com. I loved what Joseph initially said. I thought, "Man, I'd love to get feedback like that for one of my poems." Last summer, in preparing my application for a Mentorship in Poetry, I paid another poet his going rate of $50-an-hour to get the very same comments as Kathryn received (for free) from Joseph.

Okay, then I read on to discover that Praise, only, is the acceptable response here. That, in fact, one must go to a specific area to post constructive criticism. Phooey on that.

Reading a bit further, I see the comment about "what could you, a young businessman, know about poetry?" (paraphrased) and I, too, immediately thought of Ted Kooser! This particular exchange tickled my funnybone.

Lastly, is it impolite to carry on these sorts of conversations/discussions here? The article headlining this thread is Kathryn's poem honoring her son. I mean no disrespect by making my comments. If there is a better place to make these comments, where would that be?

Like I said, I'm not overly familiar with Gather.com. I don't know the protocol. I offer pre-eminent apology for any faux pas I've made herein.

"he has been here just 4 days and has 1 prose article to speak of"

> Kathryn, so this makes you a better Gatherer than Joe?

"The people he trashes are very visible in terms of their number of articles and their quality"

> You're now the Gather quality monitor?

"It has been the custom of many at Gather to post CRITICISM INVITED, when they want it; otherwise, it is expected that people will not criticize"

> The custom of many. And a new Gatherer is supposed to know this upon registering?

"His comments are NOT designed to be constructive; they are malicious in nature. Constructive criticism offers suggestions on how to make it better, specific suggestions"

> I think that if you go back and read his comments again in a couple of days once you've simmered down a bit, you'll see that his comment is full of not only constructive ideas on ways to improve your poem, but also several compliments as well.

"He has no standing here"

> And you do? What makes someone have standing on Gather? Simply that they graze over every article possible? I would think that meaningful, thought out responses would be more valued over time.

"I simply do not have time to rewrite, nor the inclination"

> You seem to have quite a bit of time. IMHO.

Susan, no, that is not the point. First, I am NOT a poet. I am a journalist. I have written poems on Gather only for the last week. This is a type of 'poetically incorrect' poem. Thta he chose me is remarkable, becuase I am not a poet. Second, I've been pubished for 30 years and have been an editor for a LONG time for major companies. His criticism is not intended as constructive; it was intended as destructive. His aim is to go around Gather randomly searching out poets and leaving comments.

He bucks the Gather system. This page, despite my repeated requests not to defile it with this discussion, is being used for this discussion.

This poem was a lovely sentiment about my son leaving for college; now, it is a circus. That is sad.

Joe is not a poet by ANY means that I can see. He has 1 article, in prose. That means so far he has NO standing up on which to comment. I have a challenge for him to create a poem that will ROCK Gather.

Then he can speak.

Susan, thank you for noticing that it IS impolte for making these comments here; I mentioned it but you are the only person so far to heed that.

You can create another article addressing the whole issue, if you like. Thta would be very appropriate and would open up the discussion.

Laura, read my comment to Susan. This page is NOT to be used any more for this purpose. I have a challenge to Joe to see if he can put his money where his mouth is: to write a poem that will ROCK Gather. His purpse is to go around Gather to disrupt poets.

Wow. For being so "popular" you really are quite closed minded about people expressing their own opinions.

I meanat this PAGE is a circus. I had intended this page to be about the poem; this PAGE is a circus. Let's see that poem, Joe Poe.

I don't want people to continue to defile this page with arguments.

I am absolutely dumbfounded. Joseph Poe spent a great deal of time on this poem. He mentions reading it aloud, indicates he dissected the work thorough, complimented what was good about the work and suggested ways to make it better. And he gets shot down for his generosity? Joe, my attempts at poetry are so elementary you'd probably tell me to turn them into country music songs (that was the original intention for most of them). However, if you ever want to take any piece of my work, poetry or prose, and give it this much time and consideration, I will greatly appreciate your time and kindness.

This is a beautiful poem written from a mother's heart; myself a mother i can empathise; i dearly love this line from the last verse.
"pray that hopes, dreams, promises
let him soar"
May God bless your mothers heart and your sons dreams and adventures
Much Love
gillena

Now..........back to the beautiful poem......is it safe to embrace the beauty of the poem here ....looks around timidly.....I'm feelin' brave.....here comes my lovin'.
I am so deeply moved by yhis hug to son....feels like your heart speaking its every whisper as he opens the door to depart. The gentle metaphor of "like dandelion to the wind" exposes a beautiful fragility....the flower's attachment to stalk of nourishment is about to yield to a new stage of life transitioning. It is about to be freed into the winds of the world, its delicate feathers off to land where they are embraced and to seed new growth. The new home environment will hopefully nourish the fledgling seeds encoded with their well-nurtured inheritance, but also posed into a new environment of unknown possibilities and potential lurking threats. A mother, unlike a stem, has a heart and has birthed a child from womb and nurtured his every breath from childhood....they are of the same source and connected by an intricately woven lifetime shared voice.

I have never had a child, but feel the pain any mother must when bidding farewell to a child when they are first leaving home as adult ready to take on the world independently.
"not the clickety-clack of a movie reel
but memories of life lived,
on baby legs he walks
no longer child, but man
yet untested, as man"

This is one of the most powerful and beautiful phrasings of a mother's pose of love and fear for a child that I have evr read.Stunningly expressive of heart.

I have found with my own mother, that I will always somewhat walk on "baby legs" in her maternal embrace of me and I have quit rebelling against it as I did when I first left her in order to separate from the power of her guidance to seek my own unique voice and acquire my own life-carved strength. I made many mistakes, but they yielded wisdom. I am sure your son will also make his, as we all do, but with a mother who loves him so deeply, he has a foundation that will always nurture him even when he is away.

In my 50's I am just now seeig how my spiritual conversations with my mother, ofen loving, sometimes discordant, all guided me in valuable ways to become who I am today. I have made amends to her for my hurtful mistakes and allowed her to apologize for her own...we both have grown into a deeper love than I ever imagined possible.
"this I cannot protect him
only pray'
These two beatiful lines are the guides for us all to follow when fearful, I think.
Withh you I now pray,
"Let him soar."
"Let his mother soar."
"Let us all soar."

This poem was an open-hearted breath that has touched me deeply. Thank you for writing this brave exposure of your deepest feelings and thoughts...they are all treasured by me ...this poem is born from a courageous search for love and truth ...there is no prescribed structure for such genuine heartvoice.
Love to you, Kathryn , Loving Mother and Gifted Poet, in this trembling time.

Thank you Gilena, thank you Laura. I have to go now. Laura, that was incredibly beautiful. I worked hard on this poem all week.

My last thought. Gatherers: A comment on constructive criticism and bad ratings. Good luck Kathryn. I hope that one day you'll see that Joe really was trying to help you out.

Kathryn wrote:
But, except for special groups in which constructive criticism is expected, most people expect an apprecation of their work on Gather, rather than cricitism.

"The voice of disappointment: I listened for an echo but heard nothing but praise." -- Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil

How disappointing. Gather, it seems, is not the place for me. Auf Wiedersehen.

Joseph Poe is exactly what Gather needs. He is willing to spend time to show a writer what works and what would improve a writer's postings. I welcome that over the continous flow of sweet "this is so wonderful" comments. I would think each writer worth their salt would welcome it, too!

Johnny said it well, Constructive criticism should be open to all groups on Gather, not just a few specialized groups... how else could a writer become a better writer? Constant praise will not improve one's writings no matter what background he/she has in the writing field.

If honesty means praising poetry that does not quite deserve it,
if honesty means refraining from giving comments that would help make a poem better,
if honesty means disagreeing with comments that are perfectly valid but are against one's views,
then, I want to be a part of the dishonest people on Gather.

Kathyrn,
I'm sorry I'm so late getting to this wonderful tribute to your son. I'm not going to bother to read all the comments that precede mine. I am now officially burned out with this little knot of nasties who come into people's websites on the blog merely to provoke, and usually from a snide point of view.
Your poem refreshes me with a mother's love for her child. You admit you are not an accomplished poet, but what you write comes from strong caretaking feelings of deep love, and is communicated with the writing skill of yours I've seen in many other forms.
Like a dandelion to the wind he goes--the clicketly clack of a movie reel--these are vivid, strong comparisons that create anchored images in the mind. The thread of worry and hope and expectation finds a lovely voice in phrases like these. I can see this poem being published in several magazines or newspapers , whose readers genuinely like a metaphorical approximation of their own inner feelings, and sentiment is not considered gauche.
This poem is rich with sentiment--and I love it precisely because it is true feeling--'sentimientos,' como dice aqui.

Laura, I'm not a poet. Joe specifically seeks out poets, why he sought me, I don't know. I have exactly 4 or so poems to my name, out of nearly 200 articles on Gather. Had he done his homework before commenting, he would have seen i'm not given to writing poetry. Still, my point earlier, was that if he criticizes, he should have some credibility. His profile does not list any previous experience in anything literary.

It's a fine poem, Kathryn. You should be proud of it.

"LIKE A DANDELION TO THE WIND HE GOES". Powerful piece, Kathryn. Expressions that could only come from a Mother's heart. How sad it is at first to see them leave hearth and home. When my first daughter went off to college, I was completely lost. Eventually, I became accustomed to her absence although she visited when she could. Fabulous piece!

Thank you, Laura, for having the courage to speak up for what appeared to me (and hopefully anyone else with a clear mind) to be gently and constructively crafted comments made by Joseph Poe. It is apparent he was hoping to provide some useful advice. It is very clear that Kathryn does not invite constructive criticism when publishing. Perhaps a useful addition to the article would have been "no criticism, just praise invited".

Wow, after reading this I am really feeling like I don't belong here at all. I am not a professional so I guess I can't comment on this poem. Sorry to sully the space.

Kathryn, YOU published this to the Critics Corner. Next time read the group guidelines before clicking on publish.

Christ, you yourself wrote an article entitled "Please Publish to Appropriate Groups"!!!

I just got in from a long day at work and have to leave extra early before I have a total of six straight days at work. So I won't be commenting much here, except to a couple of people:

Laura M., thank you for your wonderful, insightful analysis of the poem. I will now give my son this poem, with a few changes, such as directed toward him, tonight. He turned 18 last Monday. I wrote him a letter, specific to him, but wanted to add something more personal. I wasn't going to give him this poem, because I wrote it for Gather, yet it captures, as you so poignantly picked out, my feelings for him...So, I will also give it to him. Life is SO busy these days, I hardly sleep, as most people know about me. Full-time job, kids, husband, house, Gather...But a million thank yous for visiting this poem. I am honored.

JFW, thank you for stopping by to comment on this. Yes, it is rich with sentiment. I had written a letter specifically for him, mainly as guidance, but wanted to add something more. I poured my heart out in this one, as you so aptly picked up, and discovered that everything I wanted to say is here. Yes, I am not a poet, though I wrote serious poetry in college. I too weeks per poem, or, at least hours and days. I do not have that luxury now, with a full-time job, Gather, kids, husband, and lsss sleep than I should be getting. Apropos point about others with a snide attitude. The best use I have for poetic language in what I write is to use the glimpses of image/metaphor and the like in my prose; that is my strength, I feel.
A million thank yous and I am so nonored you stopped by.

Thank you, Susan and Sylvia, thank you very, very much for your kind words.

E.B. This has nothing to do with The Critic's Corner. Joe was not a member when he critiqued this. It was indiependent of that. I was just in that group, moments ago. No poem that I saw in there received anything like this treatment. None that I saw received any crtical comment, as a matter of fact. Your tone in your comment rather surprises me, E.B. It is a little harsh - I'm commenting on the tone, not your words now - yor tone takes on a personal note that I find unnecessary.

I have to go to work now. Came back late and didn't have time to reach a lot of these comments. Joe, I will address your comments specifically later today.

<< Recoils with horror>>

What in God's name has happened to this place?

Eric, EXCELLENT point. I write a poem about my son and basically to my son... I am a journalist, not a poet...

But you posted a poem.

Growing up and growing away is hard on both ends. Kathryn this was beautifully said from where I (mother to four adults) sit.

"I'm a journalist and creative non-fiction writer by trade"

does "by trade" mean that you don't get paid?

google:

Results 1 - 30 of about 56,400 English pages for "Kathryn Esplin-Oleski".

(99.999999999999999999999% gather.com)

googlenews:

Your search - "Kathryn Esplin-Oleski" - did not match any documents.

in case you're wondering why i'm saying this, it's because i don't believe you.

i feel that you are misleading me.

i feel that while it's real easy to create multiple identities and go around giving everyone 1 ratings, it's also real easy to create one identity that's a false construct.

i've also learned over the years that those who are overly defensive are usually up to something.

that's why. it's nothing personal.

Oh, I don't know about that, Martinchill. A false personality construct often takes years to create (sometimes taking an entire lifetime!), and is hardly as easy as creating multiple gather identities. ;)

outside of gather, one would be hard pressed to find poetry of this quality.

Thank you SE K !!! Thank you VERY much. You're sweet !!!