How about :
$1000 a month for an internet fan zine just for you.
Approximately $1000 a month for your own branded product, like a deoderant or toothpaste or shoe polish or something. Includes a months supply for one person. Different items could have different prices according to their 'status' in the cool rating. 'Give away' extras could be ordered at a reasonable (and private) price.
$250 a month for a phone receptionist that will assure people that you are currently "in conference" and cannot be disturbed. Just forward your phone to the supplied number and all callers will get the word.
$500 a month to keep your bio in the top ten of a Google search of your name.
$500 a month to 'ghost ' a blog in your name. For that you get two posts and six comments a week. (And we promise not to tell it is ghosted.)
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