Memoirs of Your Granny's Nurse

     "She called me the "F" word" Carol cried, as she exited Mrs. Griner's room. Tears were streaming down her usually rosy cheeks. It was almost expected. Mrs. Griner had been in the Nursing home for ten years now, a victim of a stroke that left this former artist a bitter, angry soul.
She had a knack of wringing tears out of the most seasoned professional, but I thought Carol could handle her.We forewarned each new aide that Mrs. Griner would be a test to them. "She can't control her own body, but she will certainly try to control yours.", we admonished. Assigning a "Newbie" to her was in itself a test. We figured, if you can handle  Helen Griner, you can handle anyone.

     I had tried my best with Carol. She was nevertheless, green, young and idealistic.  Three weeks out of her Nursing Assistant Training Course, she was just getting a feel for the Nursing profession.I have to admit, Carol was a natural, or so I thought, until this moment.   I try to instill a sense of compassion and empathy in all the aides I train, and Mrs. Griner would try the patience of a saint. "Move my left foot a little to the left. Now, up a little bit. No, thats too much..." and a myriad of other demands that taxed the nursing home staff. She directly caused the resignation of at least four aides, that I am aware of.   On average, she rang her call bell approximately every twenty minutes. In other words, she was a "PIA", or Pain in the Ass.

Her family had all but abandoned her, her son visited regularly, once a month, and paid more attention to whomever was on the other end of his cell phone, than his Mother. 

I took Carol aside, and embraced her. "Carol, I know Mrs. Griner can be exasperating, but you can't let her little tirades get under your skin. Remember the poem I read you in class, "Look Closer See Me"? It was a story of an old lady, in a nursing home that pleaded for the staff to look closer, to see the person that was inside the old, wrinkled up, body that no longer worked as it should". Carol looked at me with swollen, red eyes. She said, "Ya know, I have made a special effort with Mrs. Griner. I make a special effort to stop in her room when her call light is NOT ringing. Just spending a few minutes with her when she's not 'in need" seems to decrease the times she does ring.." "Then why are you crying?" I asked. "Because the "F' word she called me was "Friend".

My job is done.