Keys To The Highway: The Ultimate Road Guitar
George Corneliussen
In the years between 1976 and the summer of 1979, I pretty much lived on the road in my capacity as "monitor mixer" for the J.Geils Band. The daily routine on the road always went something like this: arrive at the hotel/motel around 6 A.M., check in, throw your suitcase on the bed, meet in the lobby of the hotel/motel, pile into the rental car, and drive to the gig. Once there, set up for the night's gig, test everything to make sure it worked, meet the crew from the opening act ( or acts ), make sure they had everything they needed, make sure that it all worked, oversee however many sound checks were needed for the bands that would be playing that night, eat some food, go back to the hotel/motel or hang out at the gig until showtime.
The highlight of the day would be the actual show; but no matter how good the show was, once it was over, everything had to be packed up and sent on its way to the next city on the tour before we could go back to the hotel/motel . After everything was packed into the truck and on its way, we would all head back to the hotel/motel and eat, socialize, or watch tv. Then it was shower and to bed for a good two to three hours sleep, wake up with the help of a wake-up call from the front desk, throw some clothes on, meet in the lobby, pile into the rental car and head to the airport to start the entire routine all over again.
Every month or so the routine was interrupted for one reason or another; at these times everybody went "home" for however many days were considered "off" until the next set of gigs.
One of the first things I always did "at home" after a road trip was to unload my suitcase. I could always tell if it was a barn-burner of a tour by the number of hotel/motel keys that were still in my suitcase.
Of course, I always intended to someday drop all these keys into the mail and send them back where they belonged. I even had a plastic bucket whose one and only function was to hold these keys when I unloaded my suitcase.
Well, days turned in months and months turned into decades. Long story short, the keys never got sent back. A few years ago, I came across my bucket of keys and started looking through them. I was surprised at what a road map they made of that period of time in my life. I decided that I should "do something" with these keys to honor them. I was sure that since they were nearly thirty years old at this point, I probably didn't need to worry about sending them back.
Sitting across the room from me was a guitar I own that I have named "The Garbage Can Guitar" . I call it that because one day, while driving to the grocery with my wife in the rain, I spied this guitar sticking out of a garbage can on the curb. I pulled the car over and checked out the guitar. It had only one minor flaw, the neck was broken off. I decided to drag the guitar home ( my wife was not pleased) and fix it. I reglued the neck, restained the guitar, changed the tuning keys, and "Voila !" I had a free guitar.
For reasons I can't explain, I decided that there would be no better use for my collection of hotel/motel keys than to glue them all over The Garbage Can Guitar, thereby creating the ultimate road guitar.
So here for your amusement or bewilderment, depending on your point of view, is a "Conqueror" classical guitar that probably had a value of about $50 when it was new. Every single hotel/motel key glued onto it is from a city the J.Geils Band played in. The old Cadillac emblem on the head of the guitar was thrown on stage one night by an overzealous fan.
The keys cover most of the United States and a few European stops as well. I play this guitar a lot more since I've added the keys to it. It just seems like a lot more fun for some reason. Plus the extra weight of the keys added to the guitar actually makes it sound better.
I guess if I've ever made an attempt at folk art, this is it. I hope you enjoy it.
Front Of Guitar
Back Of Guitar
Side Of Guitar
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Comments: 32
I believe the sublime abandon you speak of is forever lost on the great cosmic luggage carousel in the airport we call the past.
Today's electronic credit card keys just wouldn't have the same impact
I definitely don't see myself gluing paper reciepts all over anything.
I took my backstage passes and old ticket stubs from my radio days and put them in a scrapbook, adding all the stories as to why I was there, who the passes were from, who I was REALLY seeing (I still have plenty of roadie friends)... anything that made the night stand out.
My friends beeline for it when they come over.
Are you going to post a story or two ? This stuff is history of a sort after all.
Err... sounds like I SHould, huh?
My suggestion would be to go for the stories behind the stories. The things that give us all an insight into what it was like to be there. Nothing tells a bigger story than the little stories that add up to make a story big.
(btw, that's what my fiction centers around in its entirety. What it's like behind the scenes, the people who make the glamour come to life. The grit, the ugliness, the seemingly stupid rules... the fact that when you get down to it, we're all just people, too.)
Agreed, I wonder what ever happened to the companies that made the plastic part of the hotel/motel keys ? Not even all the Holiday Inn keys were the same, some had little pictures on them.
It's strange how those old keys bring back more vivid memories than pictures I have from the same time period. Old guitars never die, they just wait for the right person to find them. I have two other guitars with similar stories attached to them.
Wonderful story. Thanks for sharing.
great story.
L..
I have a notebbok that I write down story ideas in, I'll add the two guitars to the list. Thanks.
" 1974 Contessa" has a really nice ring to it. I wonder how many millions of old guitars are strumming away on any given night.
No buzz, not a peep.
All I have are my old concert tickets.
Yeah! I have an old Yamaha acoustic. It criss-crossed the country many times in the belly of a " big ol' jetliner". Thirty-plus years later it's still going strong.
I installed an old pickup on it and use it to play "hillbilly music" at nursing homes. I don't think the guitar has ever been happier.
Have fun, but don't drink too much "whus-kay".
This is so very cool..... I think it's a fitting trubute for certain.
I think the way you plastered them on your garbage can guitar is artsy and pleasing....
By the way, I loved J Geils...... and I never get anchovies on my pizza.
Thanks, glad you liked it. The garbage can guitar thanks you too.
Here's the recipe:
one part youth ;
one part ignorance ;
one part " Gooooolly ! " ;
one part "believing the dream" ;
mix ingredients together until everything you experience seems like a good idea. When anything starts to seem like it is not a good idea, resume mixing ingredients until it does.
When no amount of mixing of ingredients makes anything seem like a good idea, remove the subject from the oven, they are done.
Interesting idea , but most of the places may not even be standing anymore.
I saved almost every ticket stub from every Dead show I ever went to. I've been wanting to do something special with them - some sort of collage or whatever. Perhaps seeing your hotel key guitar will inspire me.
Do something lively with your Dead stubs !