The Cat Whisperer

When my wife was a little girl, she would bring home little critters: cats, dogs – you name it.  Kids grow out of things as they get older.  Apparently I grew out of my cat allergies (and my propensity to run into oncoming traffic.)  Anyhow, kids grow out of the things that defined their youth.  My wife, on the other hand, didn't.  She still brings home little critters, but it's one of the reasons why I her. 

On our first day of marriage she brought home a cat.  I can't say she rescued this one.  In her childhood she'd find a dog on the side of the road and would make sure it followed her home.  Then her Daddy would make sure it was taken care of until they found a home for it.  In Frosty's case, she just picked him up at the pound.  That's not usually the case.  In our seven years of marriage, we have spent more time rescuing animals from the sides of roads than we have from the evil clutches of the humane society, aka The Pound. 

Now cats are her forte.  She has a way with them.  You might call her the Cat Whisperer even, but since we've been married, we've rescued cats, dogs, mice, birds, squirrels, and rabbits…totally over 200 animals.  Some people think we own a lot of pets, but officially we only have two.  We have Frosty (the cat my wife bought me and named against my will) and Tucker (the golden retriever who replaced our departed Friendly Ben.)  The rest of the animals are all rescue animals; some of which we've had for the better part of a year.  I'm not sure they're ever leaving.  Over the years, because of my wife's cat whispering, I have learned to love cats.  And I've found, if you're going to rescue an animal, cats are the easiest.  Thank God for kitty litter. 

Our most recent rescue is Harold (some might call him, Harry Henry Chewbacca).  Now the only reason why someone might call him that is because one day I suggested Harry as a name, but accidentally called him Henry while describing him as the Wookie Chewbacca.  My wife, in her penchant for naming animals, strung all three names together and called it a done deal.  Dang, I lost again.  First she names my masculine cat, Frosty and now while cute, she names this dog Harry Henry Chewbacca.  By the time you finish saying his name, he's already peed all over the couch.  Speaking of peeing.

He gets along great with Tucker, but when they go outside to pee, Harold doesn't give an inch of ground.  He used to follow Tucker around and mark over Tucker's piles and puddles.  Now he doesn't even wait.  While Tucker has one leg in the air, Harold has other one in the air peeing into the same puddle that Tucker is making.  Then when Tucker is finished, Harold goes back and adds a fresh mark to the top.  Then he comes inside and adds a fresh mark to the corner of the sofa, the piano leg, that octagon thing might wife bought and we forgot we even had in storage until like a month ago, and the dog kennel.  I think I'm personally keeping Resolve Stain Remover on the market.  The contractor said our carpet is stain proof.  It's made from recycled soda bottles.  I don't believe it.  The stain part not the recycled bottles.  Resolve only goes so far.  I'm afraid that the only way to keep my carpet clean is to get Harold fixed.  Look out Harold…you're time is coming. 

We're waiting a little though.  This little dog is great.  He's too sweet not to belong to someone.  Someone found him and brought him to us for rescue, but we've had no luck in finding his family.  Of course, I think my wife has fallen in love with him…but she says he's not staying.  Of course, she said the same thing about George the Cat (who has been with us for six months or so).  Regardless, if it's not with us, he'll easily find a good home.