What does it truly mean to be gay? Do any of us really know? I mean, aside from the obvious facts that we are attracted to, and ultimately fall in love with a person of the same sex, what is it that makes us unique? You can walk up to any group and ask them, what is about your culture that separates you from other cultures, and they can define it. So what is it about us?
First off, is it sex? I mean honestly, is that all that we have going for us? I have seen this part of the issue from both sides, and I have not drawn a conclusion. I personally do not feel this is a legit factor in our culture, at least not one that we should use to define us. The problem being though is that you cannot watch a gay themed movie, open a gay magazine, or anything without being bombarded by images of half naked men flaunting everything that they have, in the hopes of getting us to buy something. Now yes, I understand that sex sells, however, I do not remember opening up Time or Newsweek and seeing soft-core porn in there. So why do we use it to the extent that we do? Maybe this is honestly part of the problem of definition at its core. We do not know what to use, so we use the obvious. The only question is, isn't sex something that we should be sharing with someone we care about (or the person you care about for the evening in some cases I have noticed) rather than with the world? Are we surprised that the heterosexual community goes after us because they claim we are not able to settle down and be monogamous? We are giving them the fodder, maybe it is time we should reclaim it.
Next, is it that we are flamboyant? Well, I know that I do have my nelly streak in my from time to time, especially when it comes to decorating and things of that nature. Robert on the other hand really does not have one at all. Then, there are the individuals who are more feminine than half of the girls that I know. I guess this is not a factor either, since it is not unique to all of us.
We know that economics do not play into it. Gay individuals come from all walks of life and socio-economic backgrounds, so that is also not a factor of our culture. Hmmm, this is puzzling.
This is what I have come to realize. It is us. Now, I know that sounds diluting, however it is true. We all have one factor in us, one shining example, that makes us unique. It is our will to never give up. To never stop fighting, and to be some of the best bosses, leaders, workers, husbands, wives, you name it, that we are able to be, just to show that we belong. If you doubt the motive, than you are not looking at it clearly. How many gay individuals do you know that overachieve? The question being why? To prove our worth, and it has been a trend with us for a long time. We, at this volatile time must stick together to fight issues such as adoption bans, and wedding bans, in order to persevere. If we falter now, where will we be? And will the people who rioted at Stonewall, will that sacrifice all be for not? These are the things we must keep on the forefronts of our minds, because this is our time, this is the place, and we must act upon it. Don't give up yet, we are a good group of people, I know we are, we just have to get motivated into the right direction as a group, and move away from the so-called "glitz" of sex and clubs and drugs that have defined us for so long. Let's show everyone what we are really made of.