SO YOU WANT TO PUBLISH YOUR MEMOIR - POST # 2

Psychological Tasks to Master

Publishing, like writing and marketing, is a process. Process implies action. Action implies a series of steps, each of which must be negotiated to move from an idea {i.e.writing a memoir about my Odyssey experiences} to actually publishing, and marketing it.

Staying on track with the process - from idea to execution -  I experienced - as I am certain everyone inevitably must - countless 'stuck' points. This was not a novel experience as I have written a number of original research papers and completed a dissertation. Yet I found this task to be uniquely different from anything I had ever encountered.

In reflecting as to what the difference might be, it probably has something  to do with a wish and fear of being successful. Successful to me means getting out there, daring to expose my convictions, challenging the status quo, speaking my truth in my own unique way, and allowing the chips to fall where they may ....

With each step closer to the realization of my goal - in this case, publishing the Odyssey memoir - I have experienced unexpected anxiety. {Anxiety, from a psychoanalytic perspective, is the perception of a real or imagined danger to the integrity of the self.} I associate to Kierkegarrd in his book Fear and Trembling who says: {paraphrase} to venture is to cause anxiety, but not to venture to have a self. Venturing is struggling to overcome resistance and tolerate anxiety.

Struggling with struggle is the key to success or as Spinoza says: "All excellent things are as difficult as they are rare."

Anxiety is anxiety provoking therefore the natural tendency is to avoid it at all costs. Thus when I have encountered it at the various stuck points in writing, and attempting to publish my Odyssey there have been long periods of fatigue, scratching and itching, and diversions of all kinds. Avoidance of that which stirs anxiety is experienced as relieving; yet, if one's priority is to complete a given task then not advancing the troops is experienced as frustration. Thus I have given myself no choice other than to press on.

The major psychological task has been to learn to bear increasing dosages of frustration. How ironic that this observation about the psychodynamics of publishing is the key finding of my experience at Odyssey. That is, what I learned about my Odyssey at Odyssey is also applicable to the odyssey in publishing my book. Bearing frustration {and other so called negative affects such as depression, being stuck, not knowing, complexity, ambiguity, criticism, and the like} builds a cohesive self. The operational definition of a cohesive self is the experience of something at the core that remains solid in the midst of internal and external confusion. Such an attitiude combined with forbearance enabled the turtle, not the rabbit, to win the race.

Attitude, attitude, attitude plus persistence, plus dedication, plus conviction have supplied me with the necessary fuel to both enable the creative motor to function and to persist in functioning.

The Role of Luck, Chance, Serendipity, and Synchronicity

How many times can one stand to be black-balled?  How much rejection can one put up with before you raise a white flag?  The answer is as much as one can endure. If nothing else over twenty five years of "closed doors" I have become like a solid brick. My attitude towards rejection is that it is a big bully who doesn't intimidate me anymore. He appears formidable but I refuse to pay him any mind {unless, of course, he happens to say something that is helpful.

Through the years I became convinced that I have something of importance to say. I have worked hard and long to say it - as clearly, succinctly, and entertainingly as I am able. So my attitude - pre my present publishing contract - to all my rejections is: if the collective of publishers don't want my book its their loss. Additionally, I haven't required the whole world of publishing to attend to me - just one would suffice.

Meanwhile as I was pressing on from lead to lead, idea to idea, place to place, person to person I verified that my other passion - understanding the nature and uses of meaningful coincidences - was paying  high dividends.

I discovered that if I prime my unconscious {particularly before I go to sleep} with that which I want - such as finding a publisher - my creative process is likely to be stirred. I think it is like the psychology of prayer. Focusing the mind {consciously and unconsciously} alerts the self to whatever is in the atmosphere that resonates with that which is wanted.

For example - when stuck in my writing - it has occurred with great frequency that I will notice a book in my bookcase I haven't looked at in years that will contain exactly what I need to move my ideas foreward. The same happens with the just right person appearing in an uncannily good timing way.

The ''right' idea {like navigating the internet}, plus another 'right' idea {like using key words germane to the subject of interest}  often serendipitously leads to person who may know another person and so on. This process is like participating in a psychological 'scavenger hunt' where one clue leads to another until the sought after treasure is finally attained.

Be Careful of what you want.

Details! Details! Details!

To Be Continued: