Okay, so it took us a little while to learn the ropes of full-time daycare. After all, Alex got to stay home with his Dad as his primary caregiver for almost the first two years of his life. We had the luxury of utilizing drop-in daycare strictly on an as-needed basis. All of that ended when Tim got a new job in November.
There were many adjustments to be made for all of us. We liked establishing a routine to our days. We did not like the quivering of the lower lip and the tearing of little blue eyes when it was time to leave him at the daycare in the morning. We liked hearing what an "angel" and "such a good boy" our darling was. We liked receiving his little report cards every afternoon.
Have you ever seen one of these "report cards?" They tell you what your child ate today, what was in his diaper, how long he napped, what activities he did, and what MOOD he was in. Until recently, all of ours read moods like "quiet," and "talkative," or "friendly." Until recently, we had never seen the word "busy" circled on his report card.
"Busy" doesn't sound bad at all, does it? Especially not to a multi-tasking, workaholic, super-mom like me! That's my pride and joy - and he's as busy as I am! What a chip off the old block!
Turns out "busy" does not mean "busy" at all. Not in the toddler daycare world. No, turns out "busy" really means "bad." The first time we found this out we thought it was hilarious. Alex's teacher secretly told us it's true meaning one afternoon when she told us how lucky we were that Alex was never "busy" on his report card. We just shook our heads and laughed at the other parents who had "busy" children. Not us! Doesn't apply to us!
It does now. Alex was "busy" a short while ago, after pushing his poor little friend Taylor. I arrived at daycare to pick him up one afternoon, to find him sitting in "time out." After learning why he was there, the teacher briskly handed me his report card, where I saw the dreaded word "busy" had been circled. Embarrassed, I slipped out the door with "busy" child in hand, and my tail between my legs.
How could this have happened? We remember being concerned that he was not going to be aggressive enough. His first group-play experienced ended quickly when an older child yanked a truck out of Alex's hand and walked away with it. Alex just stood there with his mouth hanging open, looking up at his Daddy with a look that said, "What the heck just happened here?" We were afraid he would be too shy to make friends, or just take a beating if a bully came along.
Turns out it doesn't matter how small you are. Being all of 5'2" tall, you think I should know this by now. And being married to a Filipino woman, you think my husband would have learned it by now!
Alex was "busy" again yesterday. The report was that he and another child had been picking on a third child. His buddy gave the poor kid a push, and Alex followed suit. Two against one! Granted, they were both smaller than the kid they pushed, but my gosh! What happened to my sweet, innocent little angel? The one who hugs me so tight, and lays his head tenderly upon my bosom, and gazes up at me with adoring eyes?
He's "busy."
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Comments: 10
We are lucky in that the daycare he goes to has been around a long time, and has been run by the same people for years.
We had looked into one of those daycares as you describe with the report cards and fecal check...and said, that is just to much info. Not to mention most of the people running it didn't look old enough to handle children.
How are you handling your son's behavior? I just know this will happen with Alex sometime or another. He is an only child, so it's hard to decide how to approach him at home that will carry over into daycare...
Looking at the picture of your child, I was half-expecting some witty Stewie Griffin captions from you.
Like you, I waited a while to have children until I was sure the time was right. I had no doubt I would be a good mother, but it took some convincing my husband that he would be a great father. Besides, the world was waiting to see what an Irish Filipino kid would look like. And I may have a biased opinion, but "Iripinos" are good looking people!
Now I know when I saw it I figured, "yeah they just pass it from kid to kid" but there student of the day is like there comments, truthfull. We have also been cutting back on his "game time" He plays computer games, Vsmile, and gamecube...and he was playing far to much. It is an easy trap to fall in, and we caught ourselves just in time. We cut his game time, and spend more quality time. Seems to be working.
My child background goes like this...
14 year old boy (first wife, reason for 1st wife) lives with mother in NH
3 year old boy (current and second wife, not reason for second wife...kicking and screaming to not have more kids, failed at attempt to reason with the woman, she won)
1 year old girl, shock, amazed, not expected, though wife could count better then that, scared to death of teen years, still thinking about trying to find chastity belt on ebay. Second wife very very happy.
The good news is that the little one has not pushed anyone in the past few days, though he did get a time out for hitting his mother with Thomas the Train last night. Like all men in my family, he is learning how to say he's sorry.