by jessie voigts
Member since:
December 19, 2005

fuzzy edges - jessie voigts - 2 word challenge

February 13, 2006 12:20 PM EST
views: 13 | comments: 24


going into surgery, they make you sign this form, that essentially states that if you die your family won't sue them.  nice.  you're already nervous. this does not help.  and then they wheel you into a cold, cold room, and you ask for a warm blanket, and people hover, and the last friendly face is the anesthesiologist, asking you to count backwards from 10. he could have easily asked you to count backwards from one, that is how quickly they knock you out.

hours, days, an eternity later (for is the soul aware, asleep, or tethered to you in some netherland?), you shift to awareness in increments.

all fuzzy edges - the white room, unrecognizable in its uniform sterility, beeps sounding distantly from the machine by your elbow. an instant of uncomfortable-ness, as you wonder what happened and where you are.

and then the fuzzy edges retreat in a heartbeat, as the pain roars in like a tidal wave, swamping your every sense with its intensity, infiltrating every molecule of your being with its prickly torture...leaving you longing for that brief fuzzy-edged moment again.



copyright 2006, jessica voigts
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Comments: 24

d g. Feb 13, 2006, 12:37pm EST
Took me back to recovery! the pain roars in like a tidal wave, yep!
why do they ask you to count back from ten??

when I had my oopharectomy I just looked at the guy like he was nuts, next thing I knew it was over.

nice work Jessie!
Rachel Slater Feb 13, 2006, 12:51pm EST
I remember that - and wondering how could there be an after life if I felt so completely gone under the anesthetic. Is that what death is like? Or is death more alive than that? Thanks for sharing this.
Christina C. Feb 13, 2006, 1:04pm EST
Pain = Alive. This is the only time I welcome pain. Still, drugs are also welcome! Suffer not.
jessie voigts Feb 13, 2006, 1:11pm EST
thanks, all! rachel - you're right - i did wonder if death was like this, or more alive (and less pain).

christina - can't take pain meds, allergic. lucky you!!
Kathryn E. Feb 13, 2006, 1:26pm EST
OMG, I don't envy your situation. This was a great, great story.
Johnny 5000 Feb 13, 2006, 1:41pm EST
"he could have easily asked you to count backwards from one, that is how quickly they knock you out."

Good line.
Monica Kennedy Feb 13, 2006, 2:44pm EST
Jessie - I watched a program on Discovery Health Channel recently called "When Anesthesia Fails." Wanna talk about horror story? Eek! Here's to anesthesia that works! So sorry pain medicine does not work for you - nothing works? Or nothing strong enough?

Well done, and thanks for participating!
George Corneliussen Feb 13, 2006, 3:13pm EST
Jessie,
Post surgery = no longer wondering what the Coyote feels like when the Acme anvil lands on him.
Stephen Schneider Feb 13, 2006, 3:16pm EST
Great post Jessie
Carol Voigts Feb 13, 2006, 3:30pm EST
I love the tidal wave image, but mostly I like that stuff they inject you with before you go down to surgery. I'd like to take a pack of that home sometime.
Serina Matteson Feb 13, 2006, 4:42pm EST
Carol, If my memory serves me correctly, that stuff is called Versed. But then again my memory is not worth crap anymore. This was a great article. Remember these feeling all too well. But I do love the pain meds just like Christina.
Aileen F. Feb 13, 2006, 5:06pm EST
jessie, great piece!
jessie voigts Feb 13, 2006, 5:49pm EST
thanks, all!

george - YES. you nailed it. i love that imagery!

monica- horrible reactions. allergic. not worth the reactions to take it, that is for sure! bleah....wish i could float away on a sea of pain meds.
Andrea W. Feb 13, 2006, 7:26pm EST
this is great, jessie.
Gisela S. Feb 13, 2006, 9:59pm EST
Ah Jessie - monster hugs for you my friend! I just hope that none of your children inherit your allergy. That's the worst, when you have to sit there helplessly watching them suffer.

As always, thanks for a thought provoking post!
Dawn M Feb 14, 2006, 12:55am EST
You have a way of taking me back to that time of surgery...and waking up.
Wonderful imagery, & words.
Carolyn Madden Feb 14, 2006, 2:56am EST
Yes, bring back that fuzzy-edged moment again. So well-written Jesse, you took me right into the recovery room with you.
Miz Lynn aka/BooBoo Feb 14, 2006, 1:49pm EST
Very vivid Jessie! Reading it made me go "ouch"! :))
Carl Neeld Feb 14, 2006, 5:56pm EST
A vivid description of anesthesia and well told. However, I found the lack of caps distracting. The piece was ingteresting enough that you didn't need gimicks.
jessie voigts Feb 14, 2006, 7:16pm EST
thanks, all! yes, gisela, i hope that lillie doesn't inherit this allergy (or any of my disabilities!)....

carl - not a gimmick. i have a hard time processing words sometimes. i have a neuro-immune disease. it is easier for me to read and write not using caps. just making it accessible to myself. sorry if it distracted you!

lynn - yes, OUCH! to infinity, eh?
Cat Givens Feb 14, 2006, 7:25pm EST
Jessie, I'm surprised my post from yesterday isn't here! Well, I'll just say it again, This is incredibly real and made me smile a smirk!
Since you're allergic to anesthesia, what do they do?
jessie voigts Feb 14, 2006, 8:29pm EST
cathy - some anesthesia is ok (the newer stuff) but i have had reactions to it. it is the pain meds that i can't take. shoot.....

thanks for the comment!

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