Tag: dimmer switch
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May 26, 2006 11:30 PM EDT --
I have a question. This particular question has plagued me for the past month, tried my wits and patience, and left me feeling uncertain about my mental faculties. I'm stumped. So I pose this question . . .
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May 26, 2006 11:08 PM EDT --
I want a theme song, written about me, just for me. My theme song should highlight all of my positive attributes and make no mentions of my flaws. On second thought I have no flaws, so the song . . .
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May 26, 2006 11:12 PM EDT --
Hello. My name is Chris, and I'm a bad neighbor.
I never thought of myself as a bad neighbor. The crazy neighbor? Perhaps. I believe I achieved crazy neighbor status last Halloween. I handed out . . .
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May 26, 2006 11:17 PM EDT --
I recently found myself in the market for a new razor. It wasn't a planned razor change; I was extremely happy with my previous razor until it unexpectedly offed itself last week in an act of "toilet . . .
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May 26, 2006 11:21 PM EDT --
(The Dimmer Switch was recently the subject of a focus group to assess its overall humor capacity. 74% of the participants in the study said they found the content of the Dimmer Switch to be entertaining . . .
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May 26, 2006 11:34 PM EDT --
Spring has finally arrived in my neck o' the woods. The calendar may say spring started over a month ago, but I doubt that mother nature received that text message. Besides, the start of spring isn't . . .
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May 26, 2006 11:37 PM EDT --
Today is a sad day for the English language. Extreme, a word that has long been associated with sporting activities that are borderline suicidal, died earlier today in a tragic accident. Born in the late . . .
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June 01, 2006 07:19 AM EDT --
My wife and I took the kids to the zoo this weekend. The zoo wouldn't take them so we had to bring them back home with us.
ba-dum-bum-CHING!
(That joke never gets old. Never gets funny, either.)
So . . .
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June 06, 2007 09:00 AM EDT --
There I was, the only man in a room of at least fifty women.
As I looked around the room, I realized that in my younger days I had wished for a situation like this. Of course, the original wish was the . . .
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December 05, 2007 10:48 PM EST --
It’s been a week since Thanksgiving. By now, you’re probably finishing the arduous task of cleaning out the leftover Thanksgiving leftovers from your fridge. Your turkey, once the plump, majestic . . .
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June 15, 2006 01:25 AM EDT --
(Cross posted from my online humor column, The Dimmer Switch. Link to original article.)
As summer comes barreling in with its stifling heat and humidity, children all across the country take up . . .
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April 24, 2008 04:05 AM EDT --
"Scream at the top of your lungs until someone pays attention." That's great advice if you've fallen down a well or an elevator shaft. If you're a parent with young children, it's . . .
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May 01, 2007 12:15 PM EDT --
Guys, we’ve known for years that we lost the battle of the sexes. The exact date fails me, but I believe it was sometime after the invention of the miniskirt when men first realized the battle had . . .
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May 09, 2007 11:16 AM EDT --
The season finale season is upon us, the time when television writers finally get around to tying up some of the show’s loose ends from the past television season. As is customary, your favorite . . .
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February 17, 2009 01:09 AM EST --
Welcome to the official start of Beard Season 2009!
Beard season, if you’re unaware, is the longest contiguous time period during a calendar year in which a man can grow his beard before his wife or . . .
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May 26, 2006 10:33 PM EDT --
I've noticed a disturbing trend on restaurant menus lately. This is probably the most distressing change to casual dining since the Restaurant Free Trade Act of 1998 made it mandatory for each restaurant . . .
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June 06, 2006 11:26 AM EDT --
(Cross posted from my online humor column, The Dimmer Switch. Link to original column)
Have you ever read one of those men's health & fitness magazines? As a rule of thumb I try to avoid . . .
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June 07, 2006 10:31 AM EDT --
(Originally posted to my online humor column, The Dimmer Switch, on 2/21/06. Link to original column .)
Note: Originally I wanted to call this Air Travel for Dummies, but the publishers of the "For . . .
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June 07, 2006 10:39 AM EDT --
(Originally appeared on my online humor column, The Dimmer Switch, on 6/23/05. Link to original article .)
I am an easily distracted person. Look, bunnies!
Ok, where was I? Ah yes, my condition. . . .
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March 27, 2007 11:22 AM EDT --
Spring is finally here with all of its usual signs of springy springness: birds are chirping; flowers are budding; baseball players are reporting for random drug testing. While nature tends . . .
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